I fall for unattractive guys... then they become obsessed with me then I become obsessed with them?

You're underachieving no doubt b/c of some feeling that you are inferior. You deliberately seek out those who fall short of your desires in the hopes that these unfortunate lotharios witl treat you as badly as you feel you deserve. Ultimately, you are afraid of rejection by those you deem worthy of your affection, so you take the coward's approach. Probably your conquests sense even if you're not overt that you despise and demean them so they reject you, naturally. They only way to change this is to get to the bottom of why you feel so undeserving of love's' 'full monte' with a good therapist. Women have comparatively little experience with success in this culture. What little they have is often begrudged and/or challenged. You're certainly not alone with this problem, which effects both genders regardless class, education, money, etc. Deal with it now before you find yourself married to one of these monsters.